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We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Reinforcements

by DeadAlive

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1.
I'm getting so fed up, I almost lost my soul tell me when my life got so far out of my own control I'm getting so fed up with these sick addictions that have their hold on me So much so I cannot even breathe. It's pathetic how we poison ourselves and question our own health when it's clear the cause is the filth we use as a means of escape, putting our dreams at stake. I'm fucking over it. I'm fucking over you. Crystal clear now that we were never close, just codependent, feeding off each others company. Why can't they see the light that I have seen. You're ignoring the air that surrounds the smog you breathe. Disgraced by your presence by your anger. Gotta get your fix caught in a fit of rage, gotta numb the pain tearing out every page. Page after page, you'll find your story empty, nothing but hollow sounds left in its place. If you could imagine for a second how to break a simple cycle of utter self destruction. Reevaluate the shattered life you have made walls you built might come crashing down It's something simple seen as monumental. A perspective shift could be detrimental to the way you saw things before. Blame not the uninformed, refuse the ignorance and be restored Things just seem so different since the time I sacrificed my mind for a couple days to erase what thought I couldn't take. But I'm stronger now, finally my struggles, head on I will face.
2.
Chameleon, into your mind I begin to blend you should have thought twice before letting me in. Constantly changing my self to fit my surroundings, a million different people living inside of me. I lose any true identity within the process of societal integration. Who am I who am I? not the right person, not the right fucking time. Painful pressures pounding down on my shoulders, and the cycle repeats over and over. I wear a mask fit for every occasion and now I've become complacent. No sense of decency do I have left in me. Get down get out get over yourself Breaking down others walls, so I can use the rubble to reinforce my own.
3.
As Fvck 03:12
4.
No more shackles to hold me back. What were the words you uttered when I was just out of your reach. I thought that I had been set free I thought that I had been set free you're the only thing I can think about. I've found no better drug to ease my mind, no interpersonal connection to release my daily stressors. I'm broken and lost with no way out in sight, no guiding lights and I must admit the darkness frightens me down to the core. I recall those nights where we became one with the world and everything else was bleak and bland. I'm falling into pieces now. Scattered throughout the winds of this wretched state. Every Hill and valley holds traces of what's left of me. An abstract compilation blends together to create a new organism. I am one on my own, your warmth is no longer my home. I am one on my own, your warmth is no longer my home. I am alone
5.
You're just so full of shit I'm getting sick and tired of it Can't respect your right to have Self-righteous guilt hanging over your shoulder A storm cloud named your own personal savior, trained to rain on your parade over and over Settle down settle down now little kiddies, preachers got a story you'll find rather fitting Next to your low self esteem, you're not as holy as me Eternal damnation is what awaits for thee The day I lost my faith, was the day I found some peace, Apostasy is a much more enlightening thing than the horror my mother claims it to be Perspectives are shifting back and forth they show me of the world and how to better define my worth Perspectives are shifting back and forth they show me of the world and how to better define my worth The next step in human evolution is to desensitize to the horrors behind this world I don't know why I think less of those who come and go I think everybody just has that side, a little place of fear from which they hide The wonder I felt like thunder struck the ground before me I can't let myself think that I'm the only one that feels the way I do An eternity stripped away from me, the streets of gold I was taught to behold and the hell that was said to threaten my feet below, crumbled as the world as we know and the universe continues to flow...
6.
Every time she compromised it got easier and easier to compromise and before she knew, her life was slipping away, the color bled from her veins 'til all that was left was black and grey The idea of a better life drained quickly from her empty eyes. And she began to romanticize the pain she felt it was all the she had left. Bitter words and songs of suffering were all that she could find the strength to bring upon herself, a self made hell she learned to love the hole she fell into A hand reached out to remove her from the hate and show the mistakes and how to build upon what little foundation was left behind A hand reached out, but the fool denied despite feigning cries for help, her health was the last thing on her mind. The last words to leave her lips, they felt so worthless and so sick, "why can't they save me?" the last line that she would sing. Fortune favors the bold. A cage built from one's own mind, self mutilation is the utmost crime. No one can break down the walls you built with solidarity in mind. The fault is yours not mine. If only she had held to that glimmer of light, and played the cards she was dealt to fight for her own mind. Nobody misses someone who was gone the whole time You must set yourself free. Only you posses the key to release the so called struggles you buried yourself beneath

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released February 23, 2014

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DeadAlive Tulsa, Oklahoma

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